Was I Talking About You?
August 16, 2008
“You” is a powerful word in copywriting. If you want your reader to identify with what you’re saying, in any type of writing – using the word “You”, is far more effective than using the passive voice.
“We” is also important, especially if you blog. After all, we as writers don’t know everything. We’re on a journey with our readers, learning from and helping each other.
But there’s times when “You” and “We” are not the most effective words to use. And I learned this the hard way recently, after these posts: “Are You Blogging Like A Barbie Doll?” and “Legacies, Links, Bad Ads and Puker Powder”.
Both posts talk about “mistakes that we make” and “mistakes that you make”. The trouble is, it’s easy to forget that some of your readers may actually feel like you’re talking about them personally. I know some folk did after they’d read the above posts, because they told me so.
But I wasn’t talking specifically about any of my readers. I was just not careful enough about the words I chose, so I’m sorry if I offended anyone.
Meanings can change quite dramatically when you use the wrong words can’t they? I learned one that I’ll never forget when I started my nurse training. If you’re about to inject a patient, never say, “Don’t worry, you’ll only feel a small prick.”
Have you ever written or said words that didn’t come out quite as you intended them to? Have you heard others do so? Do you have any favourite shocking, offensive, or hilarious word mix ups to share?
Comments
12 Responses to “Was I Talking About You?”
-
Successful And Outstanding Blogger
Hi Cath. I have a word mixup to share.
I was shopping for fresh vegetables. One of the staff was restocking some produce and their cart was in my way. I made eye contact with her and politely said, “Excuse me, I’d like to grab a leek.” There was a pause and then we both laughed.
Regarding your Barbie Doll post, I was beside myself when I popped over to read Monika’s post that you had referred to. I hadn’t read it before I made my comment, and realized that my statement that there is a lot of crap in the world was not appropriate. My mistake? Not reading her post before making my comment.
I exchanged emails with her to clarify and all is well
Davina’s last blog post..I Dreamt I Died
Davina – I am LOL. That was a real blooper that you made in the store. It’s great that we can laugh at our mistakes though.
And I’m sure Monika saw the funny side of your commenting mistake once she realised.
Ha. It was me. I took that post on proper linking personally. I gather I wasn’t the only one who reacted like that.
After my first reaction, I AM trying to link better, so I guess I learned something from that post after all.
I can’t think of a specific example right now, but life is full of misunderstandings. It’s part of being human to misunderstand, get mad, talk about it and apologize/ forgive when appropriate, then move on.
Another thought: when someone tends to often assume that things are about them, does that mean they are self-centered? I am trying to be more conscious of that actually, because life has taught me that in most cases, whatever people say is about them, not about me.
Vered’s last blog post..Are You A Parent? Stressed Much? You Should Check Out UpToUs
Hi Vered – You were one of them. But you’d be surprised at how many people thought I was calling them a Barbie blogger too.
I don’t think it means you’re self-centred if you assume something is about you. It probably means that you are more sensitive. I used to be hyper sensitive towards what people were saying.
Then I realised that most people don’t spend all that much time thinking about others. And if they were getting at me, it was probably more to do with a problem they had than it was to do with me. You’ve just got to keep reminding yourself of that.
Hi Catherine,
I KNEW you were talking about me- Barbie (doll) blogger – Barbara. (duh!) Just kidding.
The most humiliating thing I ever did (that I can think of right now – there have been many) was when I commented on Ian’s business blog. He had just done a post about how they use a public display of embarrassment if they don’t meet their goals. I commented and said,(something like) …..I think more company executives should be punished “pubicly” (instead of publicly)….. One missing letter changed the whole comment. Yikes! As luck would have it, he left the comment as I wrote it and everyone got a good laugh from it.
As for getting defensive when I read/hear something I take as a personal attack, I find I’m feeling that way as it’s raising an issue I need to address. If I can learn from it, I can grow.
Barbara Swafford’s last blog post..Casual Friday – Open Mic
Hi Barbie – I mean Barbara. I remember when you said that on Ian’s site. It was so funny.
Cath, I think words can play a big factor in our writing. In fact, it’s not uncommon for me to look over a post before I publish it, and think – this word makes a sentence seem negative, or demeaning, or … And then I’ll try to rework the sentence or word.
Story: From many years ago (it’s the first one that came to mind, I know there are many – if only my memory were better). My wife and I were out to dinner with my parents. We needed the waitress for something. I saw her at the table behind us. I leaned out with my hand, motioning in her direction, and said “Should I grab her?”. Due to where she was standing, with her back to me, and the position on my hand from a seated position, it looked exactly like I was going to grab her butt. We still joke about it to this day – so this wasn’t too bad – but funny how actions and words together can change how a sentence is perceived.
Lance’s last blog post..Sunday Thought For The Day
Raul and I misunderstand each other all the time for two reasons: English-Spanish translation problems and different views on how the world works.
When a misunderstanding crops up with Raul and with anyone, I always remind myself that very few people are purposefully cruel. I then attempt to remove my ego (the hurt little boy) and look at the situation without any dramatic emotions.
I find if I’m able to do that, then I’m able to continue the conversation without reacting negatively.
Of course in the moment, it’s very difficult to remove the ego, but hey, no one’s perfect!
Alex Fayle’s last blog post..Watching the Fireworks
Hi Cath, I know what you mean about the word YOU….I do have to go back and reread my stuff (at times) to make sure I’m being clear. I know when a blogger writes, they are not talking to me, specifically…sometimes when I leave comments, I type you and I don’t mean YOU specifically.
I thought about that when I typed my comment on your blog…of course I wasn’t talking to you, but to YOU as a group.
This is a good point to be aware of when writing. I read somewhere that…and I don’t see a lot of people doing this but to separate you from YOU with caps or reword the thing.
Thank you…yeah you Cath.
Natural’s last blog post..Traffic: Flaw in Design or Drivers?
Hi Lance – LOL – Just as well your wife saw the funny side. It reminds me of something Urban Panther wrote recently about the lion sucking wine out of the waitress’s pants.
Hi Alex – That’s great advice. Word mistakes are easy to make in one language. I should imagine more than one different language would add to the confusion. Your family seems quite multi-lingual. Your wife’s partner speaks French and your partner speaks Spanish.
Hi Valerie – I guess using you in comments is easily done. I bet I’ve done that tons of times without thinking. I hope I’ve never offended anyone too much.
@Cath – a good friend’s pants! Not a waitress!! The Lion isn’t that outrageous LOL
Urban Panther’s last blog post..Do you even care who’s looking?
Hi Urban Panther – I really read that one wrong didn’t I? I was a bit shocked that even the French could be that forward. And also that he didn’t get thrown out of the restaurant.
Cath Lawson’s last blog post..Business Ideas: Can You Keep A Secret?